Have you ever walked into a room and immediately felt like all eyes were on you? Not in the Beyoncé-on-the-red-carpet kind of way, but in the "What are they thinking about me?" sort of way?

Maybe they barely looked at you, but your mind started spinning. You adjusted your posture, questioned your outfit, and reworded your hello three times in your head. All before you reached the other side of the room.

Yep. Been there. I have an honorary PhD in overthinking.

Today, I want to unpack something powerful, and if you really get this, it's going to change everything.

So let's talk about what's really going on when you feel judged and what to do about it, so you stop handing your peace over to someone else's possible opinion. Sound good?

Because here's the thing to remember: Feeling judged doesn't mean you're being judged. Yup, you read it right. Sorry to burst your bubble. All it means is that you're focusing on the possibility of judgment.

Let me break this down.

When someone says, "I feel judged," what they're actually feeling is the sting of a story they've told themselves.

Think about that. Judgment isn't a beam someone shoots at you. It's a meaning your brain assigns based on facial expressions, energy, silence, or tone. It's a pattern. A filter. Like a scratched-up pair of sunglasses. You don't even realize the world's not actually that dim until you take them off.

Here's the essential truth you need to remember. Right now, this very moment, there are thousands of things in your environment you could focus on. The warmth in your hands. The sound of laughter in the distance. The rhythm of your breath. The texture of your shirt. The fact that your heart is still beating and you made it through another hard day.

But if your brain is used to looking for judgment like a heat-seeking missile, it will find some reason to feel rejected or not enough.

The good news? You can retrain your brain.

Judgment only holds power if it becomes the center of your focus. But YOU are the storyteller. You hold the highlighter. And you can choose to underline something entirely different.

Let me explain. Imagine walking through life like a grocery store scanner.

Beep — "They looked at me funny."

Beep — "She didn't like my post."

Beep — "They whispered when I walked in."

It might feel like judgment is all there is. But the truth is that the scanner only beeps at what it's programmed to detect.

What if we programmed it to look for:

Beep — "Someone smiled at me."

Beep — "I showed up anyway."

Beep — "I kept my heart open today."

You don't need to change other people. You need to change the setting on your internal scanner.

Let's make this practical. Next time you feel judged, ask yourself:

"What story am I creating right now?"

"Is this a reflection of what's happening, or what I've trained myself to expect?"

"What else could I focus on in this moment that supports me?"

You're not ignoring your feelings. You're not pretending the judgment can't exist. You're just choosing not to worship it. And that is liberation.

Let's also remember: Most of the time, we're guessing. We are not mind readers (thank goodness).

That look? Could've been gas. That silence? Could be overthinking their own stuff. That weird energy? Could be 3 hours of sleep and no caffeine.

People are walking around with whole universes swirling inside of them,

and it's rarely about you. Seriously! 98% of the time, it's about them.

You just walked into their orbit.

So, here's a truth to tattoo on your brain: You can't control if someone judges you. But you can control whether it anchors in you.

Judgment has no roots unless you make soil for it. And every time you choose to shift your focus to joy, to presence, to truth, to your own alignment, you reclaim a little more of your power.

Ready for a fun, fast shift?

Try this fun practice today: The "Flip the Focus" Game:

1. Catch yourself in a judgment spiral.
2. Say out loud (or in your head):
3. "Interesting. That's one possibility. What else could I focus on right now?"
4. Choose a different thread: your breath, your feet on the floor, a moment of gratitude, something beautiful in your environment.
5. Smile. Even just slightly. Your brain doesn't need a reason to smile; it just needs the signal. (And smiling resets your nervous system. Bonus, right?)

Let me end with this final thought: You are not here to mould yourself small enough to fit into someone else's comfort zone. You are here to shine, stumble, stretch, and grow into the full expression of who you already are underneath all the fear.

So let them judge. Let them have their opinions. Let them scroll and whisper and project.

You? You get to create. You get to live. You get to choose your focus like it's the steering wheel to your next chapter because it is.

And remember: The spotlight can't shine on judgment and joy at the same time. So pick what you want to grow.

You are not the opinion others hold of you. You are the author. So, write accordingly.

Much love,
Marie-Josee
Live. Love. Laugh. It matters because YOU matter!

Photo by Erik Mclean on Unsplash