Let's talk about something that sneaks up on almost everyone at some point. You do the thing. You show up. You help. You bend, you stretch, you rearrange yourself to keep the wheels turning for your team, your family, your community. You hold space. You offer solutions. You're the one who remembers the birthdays and the deadlines.

And then? Nothing. No "thank you." No acknowledgment. No "Wow, I see how much you're doing."

And it starts to sting. Not because you need praise, but because you need to matter. To be seen. To not feel invisible in the very space you're helping to hold together.

Can you relate?

It's the silent ache of unacknowledged effort. And it's sneaky because it doesn't always come with fireworks. It's more like a slow drip of resentment, of burnout, of wondering, "Why do I even bother?"

It sounds like:

• "Why does no one see what I'm doing?"
• "Am I just being used?"
• "Would anyone even notice if I stopped?"

And the ache behind all of it is simple: "I don't feel appreciated."

Oof. Right?

Let's go there, gently, and see what's underneath.

Here's the radical idea I want to offer:

When we feel deeply unappreciated, it's often a signal that we've been overgiving, but under-receiving from ourselves.

It's not just about what they aren't giving. It's about what you haven't acknowledged.

Stay with me.

Imagine you're walking around with a beautiful glass pitcher of fresh-squeezed juice. And everyone's got a cup.

"Can I have some?" they ask. And you're like, "Of course! Here's some for you, and you, and ooh, you look thirsty too!" You pour and pour and pour until the pitcher's empty. And now you're tired and your cup is empty. Now you are thirsty. But no one seems to notice.

They're sipping while you are quietly shrinking. And inside, you're thinking: "Why aren't they refilling me?"

But here's what's missing:

They don't know what's in your pitcher. They don't know how full or empty you are. You never told them because somewhere deep down, you believed your job was to pour, not to protect your pitcher.

Feeling unappreciated isn't a weakness. The real source of the ache is not that they didn't notice. It's your soul whispering, "Hey, love, can we love us again?"

"Can we acknowledge how much we're carrying?"

"Can we stop waiting for them to say thank you and start saying it to ourselves?"

See, waiting for appreciation from people who don't know when to give it

is like trying to quench your thirst from a paper cup full of sand. You'll stay dry, frustrated, and convinced something's wrong with you.

But it's not about your worth. It's about where you've been looking for validation.

From a neuroscience lens, this makes so much sense. Your brain is constantly scanning for threats, and being unseen feels like a threat to your belonging.

So it zeroes in on the missing thanks, the skipped appreciation, the lack of applause. But it also skips over the 94 things you did brilliantly and how YOU showed up with integrity, heart, and presence.

Your brain's not broken. It's wired to scan for gaps. It's been taught to chase love like a moving target. But what if you stopped chasing?

What if you turned around and said:

• "Hey, I see you."
• "I appreciate you."
• "Look at how far you've come."

Here's a mini practice that takes less than 60 seconds:

When you feel unappreciated, pause and ask yourself:

1. "What specifically did I do that I wish they acknowledged?"
2. "Can I acknowledge it to myself right now with love?"
3. "Where have I not been receiving my own appreciation?"

Then say it out loud.

• "I handled that conversation with so much grace."
• "I showed up even when I was tired, and that matters."
• "I'm allowed to be proud of myself."

You're not doing this to let others off the hook. You're doing it so you stop abandoning yourself in the process of loving others.

As for those who don't acknowledge you? Accept that some people don't see it. They don't say thank you. They don't clap. They don't notice what they didn't do.

But if your value is based on their vision, you'll always be waiting in the hallway, hoping someone opens the door.

Love, you are the door. You don't need to be invited in. You get to walk in.

You're allowed to acknowledge yourself. So, say it with me:

"I don't need to earn appreciation.

I AM appreciation.

I am a walking expression of care, power, and devotion.

And I'm allowed to see myself clearly even if no one else claps."

And honestly, that's the magic of Story Alchemy. Instead of writing the story where you're unseen, you write the one where you stand in your own spotlight. And from that place, appreciation becomes a gift, not a currency you have to hustle for.

Much love,
Marie-Josee
Live. Love. Laugh. It matters because YOU matter!

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash